01/01/2012
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If you want to be happy and stay happy you need to remember you have to work at it. Work at being happy? Yes. Everything that is worth having needs effort from you. That includes happiness.
How to be happy and stay that way? Well, by constantly practicing being happy. Learn from your mistakes, adjust, and work at it again. I liken the pursuit of happiness to a series of continuous short races that never ends.
It is hard work, but if you have the wisdom to see how it all adds up, you may just find your nirvana or heaven, whichever the case maybe.
If you want to be happy and to stay happy, you need to cultivate. That means see yourself nurturing the habits that brings happiness to you. You may not succeed everyday in doing it, but this pursuit of perfection is what will contribute bit by bit to you being happy and staying that way.
What are some of the things you can do then on how to be happy and stay happy?
Giving
Here we are not just talking about charity. Giving involves a lot more. It means giving up bad habits. What are the bad habits that bring you stress? Give up on these habits. Are you disorganized? Being disorganized in all aspects of your life may deprive you of a lot of the happiness you are seeking. Once you learn to give up bad habits you will gradually become happier.
Ever considered giving in? Do you hold on to opinions that you hide as principles and are too egoistic to let go? Give in; you do not always need to win an argument. You do not always need to be the car in front in a traffic jam. You will soon learn when you give in, you do not lose but stand more to gain.
Give out, yes, by this it means charity. Help someone in need and do not judge who is worthy of your help. Help a rich person who is in need. Sometimes people think there are people unworthy of our help. The practice of giving to gain happiness is one that helps us learn about detachment.
Think, Say and Do
In all that you think, say and do, make sure they are as congruent as possible. A lot of times, what you preach to people and what you practice are different. When what you think, feel, and do are not in line you will not find happiness. Even if you do, it will not stay that way.
Think good thoughts. Do not scheme behind people's backs and think good of people. Think how you can help people rather than plot for selfish goals. Avoid telling lies, gossiping, and harsh speech. The Chinese have a saying loosely translated that says, "Sickness comes in through the mouth, trouble comes out from the mouth." It means we become sick from the things we ingest and we get into trouble with the things we say. Ask yourself, do you speak the truth? Do you speak gently? Say things that will help others? And speak at a proper time and place? Do good things and be of good conduct. It can be as simple as not getting intoxicated, being organized, not procrastinating, or even waking up early to get your life organized. Small things like these add up to being happy and staying that way.
How to be happy and to stay happy is a cultivation that takes time. It cannot be overnight and it is not one that you do and forget. Take small steps, you will stumble but if you keep at it, eventually you will feel happier and stay that way longer.
Long Yun Siang, or Long, as he is popularly known runs http://career-success-for-newbies.com with his wife Dorena as their way of paying it forward. Their Web site -– based on their real life experience -- provides tips, tools, and advice for newbies pursuing career success.
© 2011 Long Yun Siang
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